tell you that during dates with women, the purpose is to have a
buildup of attraction and enjoyment.
'Buildup' is important... as no gal would want a male as a
boyfriend (or reach a higher level of intimacy with him) if she
doesn't feel reasonably drawn to him or find him a bore.
This accumulation of feelings can be destroyed though.
For instance, you meet a lady for the first date. She's quite
attracted to you and enjoys your company.
Then during the next date, out of nowhere she starts complaining
about how that colleague at her workplace is bitchin' about her to
the boss behind her back.
You tried listening and suggesting what she can do.
And her complaining starts to prolong further and further... all
the way till it becomes not just her problem but YOURS as well.
In the end, it looks more like a complain session than a date.
Believe it or not, prolonged negativity on a date (even if it's her
personal stuff and it's got nothing to do with you) is a killer of
attraction and enjoyment buildup.
Worse, some guys hear a woman complain on a date, and they
encourage the complain further!
Sure, women grumble at certain intervals but when the complain is
PROLONGED, the buildup collapses.
Why?
Firstly, you might turn into a "complain buddy" of hers. NOT a
lover.
Second, the negativity of complain may crawl its way to cling to
you. Such that she equates seeing you as a negative experience.
So, what I say next is going to shake a lot of guy's old thoughts
and make them go "what the heck?"
I'll say it - When you're out a lady on a date, and somehow she
complains about an unhappy incident... You are NOT meant to stay
on and "listen".
Before it can prolong further, you are meant to stop the negative
train.
The attraction and enjoyment you've built so far won't be
threatened.
Don't encourage any grumblings or negatives further. Here's what
you can say to your date - "I know things don't turn out the way
you wanted. But guess what? Right here, you're far away from
whatever that had happened. You can relax now. Let's just enjoy
ourselves."
Then break into a smile and talk about something else.
As mentioned, I know this will disturb a lot of nice guys who
prefer to 'give a listening ear' to a complaining date.
Yet, believe it when I say these guys often end up as FRIENDS to
the lady. Nothing else.
So go ahead, use what you've read so far. Dates are meant to move
you forward with the gal, not backwards.
With respect,
Skilldo
