During a one-on-one outing with a lady, if the entire date is
plagued with silences and "empty spaces"... then I'm sure you know
deep inside that chances of the girl being interested is close to
zero.
It sucks especially if that is the 1ST date.
Because if the first date is just chat... stop... chat... stop...
then often times, a woman will NOT want such boredom to repeat
another time (otherwise known as "NO 2ND DATE").
Let's talk about how do we prevent such an outcome then.
One of the many "hidden weapons" I use to stomp silences on dates
is - Bring up a SCENARIO and talk about it.
The key here is to bring up an incident in life (a scenario),
relate it to the woman and get her thoughts on it...
... And one of the best scenarios comes from - "Other People's
Relationships".
It may be a dramatic relationship issue involving a third party:
Your friends, cousins, colleagues, or some stranger you hardly knew.
Here's how to apply it.
While talking to the woman, when you "detect" an empty space
coming, or a silent pause had just begun, you can just lead
smoothly into a scenario, and break out of a silence by saying to
her:
"Recently, there's something crazy that happened to my
(friend/cousin/old classmate). I'll tell you what happened... and I
bet you're going to shake your head after hearing it."
Then you relate an "Other People's Relationships" Scenario to her.
Let me kick off 3 scenarios to give you some ideas -
Scenario 1) "This female classmate I knew from old schooldays
wanted to audition for Singapore Idol. And her boyfriend threatened
to break up with her because he never liked showbiz... thinking
it's all fake glamour and phony people. So let's say it happened to
you... what will you do if you are her?"
Scenario 2) "It's this old army friend I knew. He liked Jay Chou a
lot and he planned to go to the concert. At first, he wanted his
girlfriend to go with him... but her schedule doesn't allow it. So
in the end, he asked a lady friend to go and guess what? His
girlfriend knew about it, kicked up a fuss and demanded he go to
the concert by himself... not with that lady. So now he's already
bought the tickets and is stuck with an angry girlfriend. What do
you think he should do?"
Scenario 3) "This couple I know had been together for 5 years. They
both have the same "lovers tattoo" on their ankles but lately, the
girl went to enhance the tattoo with extra designs without telling
the guy. When the guy saw it, he was upset and told the girl her
tattoo is no longer something that signify their love... since it
looked different now. The girl then suggest him to enhance his
tattoo to look like hers. But he refused flatly. So... who's right
and who's wrong in this case?"
Once again, rid silence moments by placing a scenario into the
interaction, then get her view on it.
(Conversations will re-generate from there)
In all, the above is just ONE tactic to keep the conversation
going. I have DOZENS more "conversation maintenance" secrets to
ensure every interactions you have with women will be a FLOW
instead of a struggle.
Take care!
With Respect,
Skilldo
Friday, January 18, 2008
Monday, January 14, 2008
What to Do 15 Seconds BEFORE You Approach a Woman...
Here's a brief tale (perhaps you can find it close to what you've
experienced) -
A guy is at a public place and the scene is great for socializing.
He sees a lady who looked friendly to talk to... and he can walk up
anytime now...
... but as that is happening, a "hold back" happens.
He starts to have "THOUGHTS" or a voice in his head calling out
"Wait, this type of girls usually have boyfriends." or "She
probably don't want to talk now."
That thing in his head causes the "Want/ Don't Want" internal
struggle, that ends up with him staying at his same spot rather
than going up to have a conversation.
Then when he went home, he starts thinking "I could have, I should
have, I would have done this...".
The End.
From a bigger view, there are so many times where guys could just
spring into action with an approach, that leads to the woman
chatting.
But it was pulled back ONLY seconds before it can happen...
... because some thought or voice suddenly jumps out in the head.
And every day in Singapore, many approaches on women (that didn't
happen) went unused.
So...
How to reduce this "pull back" that happens in the last moments
before you're ready to approach?
A neat tactic a mentor once taught me, is to make the "Inner
Critic" (the discouraging thoughts or voice in your head) become a
CHARACTER.
(That's right. You're going to take the invisible stuff holding
back your victories with women, and turn it into a character.)
- Give this "Inner Critic" character a name.
- Define how he (may even be a 'she') looked like.
- Know how this "Inner Critic" behave.
Perhaps this "Inner Critic" character is a younger or 'less cool'
version of yourself. Maybe it's not even a human (one of my friend
describes his Inner Critic as a masked creature).
Try to identify yours now. Reason being - you can easily deal with
it in case it springs up again, during critical moments before you
walk up to a cute gal.
As an example, my own Inner Critic is named "Zero". Whenever
Zero tries to critic or discourage me in my mind, I'll mock him
playfully... even to the extend of making him cry.
Do the same with your Inner Critic as well. Slam any discouraging
messages back.
For instance, you're about to walk up and talk to a gal. Your Inner
Critic goes, "Don't do it. She may have a boyfriend."
Then you can TALK BACK to your Inner Critic - "Maybe. But I'd
rather talk to her and find out for myself. You don't have to
approach. I'll be doing it and you can just hide in a hole and
watch."
Or when you're in a bookstore and ready to talk to a gal. The Inner
Critic goes, "Eh, she's looking at books and if you talk to her,
you will disturb her."
Go ahead and shoot back "If I'm disturbing her, that's for her to
tell me. NOT you. So go jerk off somewhere while I'm man enough to
attempt things you don't dare to."
You may choose to be less aggressive. You may not want to "bully",
that's cool. As a suggestion, just take on a HIGHER position and
pin down your Inner Critic from throwing messages that can block you
from meeting women.
Use it. You'll be surprised that when the "Girl-getting mental
foundation" of a man is concrete, the tactics and gambits he used
from there automatically becomes smooth.
That said, I've devoted a full course-work bootcamp (on 26, 27 Jan
2008) where the first thing being touched on is
"mind-strengtheners" that shield you against nervousness or fear of
rejection from women.
When that's established, it is followed by solid tactics to
approach, date and get into a relationship with the type of woman
you want.
Take care!
With Respect,
Skilldo
experienced) -
A guy is at a public place and the scene is great for socializing.
He sees a lady who looked friendly to talk to... and he can walk up
anytime now...
... but as that is happening, a "hold back" happens.
He starts to have "THOUGHTS" or a voice in his head calling out
"Wait, this type of girls usually have boyfriends." or "She
probably don't want to talk now."
That thing in his head causes the "Want/ Don't Want" internal
struggle, that ends up with him staying at his same spot rather
than going up to have a conversation.
Then when he went home, he starts thinking "I could have, I should
have, I would have done this...".
The End.
From a bigger view, there are so many times where guys could just
spring into action with an approach, that leads to the woman
chatting.
But it was pulled back ONLY seconds before it can happen...
... because some thought or voice suddenly jumps out in the head.
And every day in Singapore, many approaches on women (that didn't
happen) went unused.
So...
How to reduce this "pull back" that happens in the last moments
before you're ready to approach?
A neat tactic a mentor once taught me, is to make the "Inner
Critic" (the discouraging thoughts or voice in your head) become a
CHARACTER.
(That's right. You're going to take the invisible stuff holding
back your victories with women, and turn it into a character.)
- Give this "Inner Critic" character a name.
- Define how he (may even be a 'she') looked like.
- Know how this "Inner Critic" behave.
Perhaps this "Inner Critic" character is a younger or 'less cool'
version of yourself. Maybe it's not even a human (one of my friend
describes his Inner Critic as a masked creature).
Try to identify yours now. Reason being - you can easily deal with
it in case it springs up again, during critical moments before you
walk up to a cute gal.
As an example, my own Inner Critic is named "Zero". Whenever
Zero tries to critic or discourage me in my mind, I'll mock him
playfully... even to the extend of making him cry.
Do the same with your Inner Critic as well. Slam any discouraging
messages back.
For instance, you're about to walk up and talk to a gal. Your Inner
Critic goes, "Don't do it. She may have a boyfriend."
Then you can TALK BACK to your Inner Critic - "Maybe. But I'd
rather talk to her and find out for myself. You don't have to
approach. I'll be doing it and you can just hide in a hole and
watch."
Or when you're in a bookstore and ready to talk to a gal. The Inner
Critic goes, "Eh, she's looking at books and if you talk to her,
you will disturb her."
Go ahead and shoot back "If I'm disturbing her, that's for her to
tell me. NOT you. So go jerk off somewhere while I'm man enough to
attempt things you don't dare to."
You may choose to be less aggressive. You may not want to "bully",
that's cool. As a suggestion, just take on a HIGHER position and
pin down your Inner Critic from throwing messages that can block you
from meeting women.
Use it. You'll be surprised that when the "Girl-getting mental
foundation" of a man is concrete, the tactics and gambits he used
from there automatically becomes smooth.
That said, I've devoted a full course-work bootcamp (on 26, 27 Jan
2008) where the first thing being touched on is
"mind-strengtheners" that shield you against nervousness or fear of
rejection from women.
When that's established, it is followed by solid tactics to
approach, date and get into a relationship with the type of woman
you want.
Take care!
With Respect,
Skilldo
Friday, January 11, 2008
How to "Fire Up" Yourself to Meet & Date Women (And Actually Go Do it)
Has this happened to you?
One typical day between Monday to Friday, you think to yourself you
wanted to do SOMETHING during that weekend... to move one step
closer in attaining success with women.
Maybe it's...
- To approach gals someplace near your house and get at least 2
phone numbers.
- Or to make a date happen by smsing a lady to hang out with you.
- Or a plan to talk to as many women as you can at a friend's party
you're going.
So when weekend came, what happened INSTEAD was -
1) You did something else. The "Females socializing crusade" you
set out to do never happened.
2) Or you did LESS than what was originally intended.
In such cases, few things can happen. Your 'meet & date' plan might
be distracted by sudden work or unrelated stuffs.
Most times however, it's a matter of "lost motivation".
(When it's nearer to the day you want to go out and be around
women, the URGE to do it just gets weakened.)
So...
How to keep up and follow the girl-getting improvement plan you set
for yourself (and NOT lose the "mood" to do so)?
Personally, I realized by injecting a dose of "making yourself
answerable" helps A LOT.
Tell someone YOU TRUST on what you plan to achieve in your dating
life.
Share with the person what exact steps you're going to take to get
there...
... and what happens *IF* you slack or neglect to do it.
In other words, by making yourself accountable, your "heightened
state" to progress with the opposite sex will sustain itself.
I can never forget how I initially started out, I find myself
having 'on and off' inactivty in knowing and dating women.
Luckily...
... having met some masterful men who are good in this area, I
"reported" to them what I wanted to do... and how much of it I had
done.
That alone kept the 'fire' up and inactivity down. It's a BIG
component to dating success.
Again it's because...
"In the presence of being answerable to another person, one can
SUSTAIN his girl-getting momentum."
With respect,
Skilldo
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
The "Core" of Becoming Good With Women...
If you make an observation...
- It's NOT the most good-looking guy who gets the most attractive
girl.
- It's NOT the tallest guy who gets the prettiest lady.
- And it's definitely NOT the nicest guy who gets the most
nice-faced gal.
Instead...
Usually the guy who succeeds in the above scenarios...
...is one who owns a HIGH ABILITY to combine 'what to say' with
'what to do' to make women magnetized to him.
And what to say or do to attract a woman is generated as a result
of his "core".
Let's talk about that.
Simply put, the "core" is a set of rules of how a person lives out
his male/female interaction, dating and girl-getting.
It's the STARTING POINT of any action or (non-action) that
determines how far a man can become successful with women.
For instance, one male can be single and lonely for many years
because his "core" is made up of rules that says - "Good things
happen to those who wait" or "All the good girls are already taken
so why even try?".
That made him decay or NOT want to do something about his situation.
On the other hand...
Another male can attain closeness and intimacy with his type of
attractive lady because his "core" is made up of a rule saying -
"This lady is going to end up with someguy in the future. I might
as well be that guy."
Going back to the beginning of this letter, if one's "core" says he
has to be super good-looking, tall or ultra-nice to bring back
success with the opposite sex, then that may just cause unecessary
SLOW-DOWNS in meeting and dating women.
With respect,
Skilldo
- It's NOT the most good-looking guy who gets the most attractive
girl.
- It's NOT the tallest guy who gets the prettiest lady.
- And it's definitely NOT the nicest guy who gets the most
nice-faced gal.
Instead...
Usually the guy who succeeds in the above scenarios...
...is one who owns a HIGH ABILITY to combine 'what to say' with
'what to do' to make women magnetized to him.
And what to say or do to attract a woman is generated as a result
of his "core".
Let's talk about that.
Simply put, the "core" is a set of rules of how a person lives out
his male/female interaction, dating and girl-getting.
It's the STARTING POINT of any action or (non-action) that
determines how far a man can become successful with women.
For instance, one male can be single and lonely for many years
because his "core" is made up of rules that says - "Good things
happen to those who wait" or "All the good girls are already taken
so why even try?".
That made him decay or NOT want to do something about his situation.
On the other hand...
Another male can attain closeness and intimacy with his type of
attractive lady because his "core" is made up of a rule saying -
"This lady is going to end up with someguy in the future. I might
as well be that guy."
Going back to the beginning of this letter, if one's "core" says he
has to be super good-looking, tall or ultra-nice to bring back
success with the opposite sex, then that may just cause unecessary
SLOW-DOWNS in meeting and dating women.
With respect,
Skilldo
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